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By now you know that Harvest Church is hosting a special conference this spring called “Caring for One Another” (Friday-Saturday, April 21-22), featuring Dr. Ed Welch. Perhaps you’ve wondered, “Why should I attend this conference?” Great question! Here’s offering several reasons for your prayerful consideration:

At the heart of biblical change is a relational transaction: the real you engages the real God in the midst of real trouble. When someone seeks my pastoral counsel, this is one key principle that I try to help the person understand in the early stages of the counseling process.

Of course, grasping this concept is one thing; putting it into practice is another. Inevitably, a counselee will ask me, “How do I do this?” Great question! I think the answer is more easily “caught” than “taught,” which is why I love taking people to the Book of Psalms to eavesdrop on the prayers of God’s troubled people. When we slow down and watch closely, we see this relational, heart-to-heart transaction happening before our eyes.

Clearly, the needs for wise care within the church far exceed the capacity of any pastor, and clearly, the solution is to multiply wise helpers within the church through training. “How?” is the million-dollar question! The Christian Counseling & Educational Foundation (CCEF) is a biblical counseling ministry that God is using worldwide to help pastors like me answer this all-important, how-to question.

Here’s inviting you to join me in assessing and redressing a small but important slice of daily life: the words we speak to the people around us. But first some context to orient you. Two weeks ago, I preached from Proverbs 9. In the preceding chapters, we overhear a father counseling his young, soon-to-be-launched-into-the-world son by means of a series of ten fatherly talks: “Listen, my son . . .” (1:8-19; 2:1-22; 3:1-12; 3:21-25; 4:1-9; 4:10-19; 4:20-27; 5:1-23; 6:20-35; 7:1-27). Then, in chapter nine, we come to the climatic conclusion in which we hear two competing “counselors”—"Woman Wisdom” (vv. 1-6) and “Dame Folly” (vv. 13-18)—bidding for the allegiance of the son’s heart: “Whoever is simple, let him turn in here!” (vv. 4; 16). Now the kicker: You and I are the son who must decide between the two!

“How do I act right when my spouse acts wrong?” That’s a great question! Let me recommend one resource that works out biblically-wise answers in ways that are practical and true to life: "How to Act Right When Your Spouse Acts Wrong" by Biblical counselor Leslie Vernick. In what follows, I’ve tried to summarize what Vernick says in 200 pages. If you find yourself reacting sinfully to being sinned against by your spouse, or if you know someone who does, let me encourage you to read and apply this book in your life and ministry. Of course, if you would like to sit down together and talk about these sorts of struggles, please let me know; I would be glad to help you!

How do you get FROM Big Ben TO Buckingham Palace? Or more generally, how do you get FROM any point A TO any point B within a six-mile radius from the center of downtown London? You’ll find no better guides than the drivers of the Black Cab. The reason? As Gregory Hudson puts it, “Cabbies are famed for possessing a detailed understanding of the city.” First comes a few years of training, then comes a thoroughgoing testing. The result? These drivers possess a “mental map” of some 25,000 city streets! They call it “The Knowledge”—a very practical, down-to-earth understanding of how to take a person FROM here TO there.

In recent years, there’s been a lot of talk in the news about government surveillance. I know little to nothing about this earthly sort of intelligence gathering, but I have come to know something about the unearthly sort of personal monitoring revealed in the Bible: “Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give an account” (Heb 4:13). In Scripture, God reveals himself as the infallible and reliable Searcher of hearts. As such, he is the God who sees clearly, and who speaks redemptively to what he sees.

At the heart of biblical change is a relational transaction: the real you engages the real God in the midst of real trouble. When someone seeks my pastoral counsel, this is one key principle that I try to help the person understand in the early stages of the counseling process.